Well I've been busy in life this summer break and even more productive this school-less months. I've made several blogs (pretty much organized my billion thoughts) and been making time to post stuff. It's hard, but getting the hang of it. I'll put the links if you want to check them out ;)
Anything Drama related:
http://takosdrama.wordpress.com/
Everything else I watch:
http://mintandcottoncandyfrost.wordpress.com/
Anything Church:
http://sundaywheat.wordpress.com/
My personal (online) journal:
http://bubblesinmyhead.wordpress.com/
This blog will ever be my old memoirs of my journey :)
Sunday, September 16, 2012
Thursday, January 5, 2012
*yaawwn* but THANK GOD for DRAMAS!
I'm soo tired, yet I can't sleep 'cause I'm used to sleeping later than 12am. Why I sleep so late? Because the house is peacefully quiet, it is dark, I have privacy, I'm alone-ish, I feel great, I can clear my head, I can think, and thousand other reasons. I just finished watching Hi My Sweatheart, a tdrama. (Another reason why I stay up late lol). If I'm an addict to k/t-dramas is because my body wants to scape my lame life. I should be focusing to pay off my school debt, see the classes I need, see what I can afford to get, what I will do in my spare time, how I'll manage to get money, etc. So yeah, an hour seeing a cute chick with a HOT guy seems like the best drug so far. For this year, I don't have a resolution. Just little goals. Writing, having a relationship with God, becoming more an adult, are just a few in the list (along with a list of dramas to watch!). Oh sadness, how I feel thee, yet I don't have tears to shed. None. I'm just left with that awful feeling in my heart, that feeling of being smashed to pieces. And that's why I love dramas, I get in touch with the over-the-top-squealing-sweet-tender-immature-little-girl inside me.
Monday, January 2, 2012
Elllloooo Wooooorrrlllldd!
I haven't blogged my stuff in a while, (in years!) so I'm deciding to do pieces of my life. I miss writing random stuff, so I'll do it again. I've been going to bed super late (2am the latest) and it's becoming a habbit. I've been catching up (or trying) dramas. Although they're mostly korean, I like taiwanesse too. So this is the list of the ones I'm currently watching :
Padam Padam (now airing), Three With Deep Roots, and A Thousand Days Promise. Taiwanese - Hi my sweetheart. (I just finished Woody Sambo / Invincible Boe Mei)
Shall post again sometime...hopefully :)
Padam Padam (now airing), Three With Deep Roots, and A Thousand Days Promise. Taiwanese - Hi my sweetheart. (I just finished Woody Sambo / Invincible Boe Mei)
Shall post again sometime...hopefully :)
Monday, June 22, 2009
Save a Life Institute: Chapter I ????
“You have less than a year to live Mr. Beddau.”
The Doctor announced coldly as he handed him the final results from the tests he had taken. Elionai had been expecting such news. He felt how his body grew weak and cold after the Doctor’s words. It was over then, he had an expiration date. His thoughts were interrupted by his mother’s arrogance.
“No! there must be something else. A cure, surgery, medicine, therapy, anything, everything, just something. Something!”
“Mrs. Beddau, I know this must be hard, it’s not an easy thing, but you must understand we have tried all those things for months. Time is running out. We can keep trying but we cannot promise anything.”
“There must be something we have not tried! You must understand he’s our only son, the inheritor of everything we have worked for, our name carrier. He is a Beddau for God’s sake!”
“I clearly understand Mrs. Beddau, no one takes such news well. We still have time to try therapy again or if you would like to continue the medicine. I must admit he is not showing any improving results on any of the therapies he has tried.”
“If for a second you think I will not try everything you are wrong Dr. Vineyard.”
“I understand Ma’am, please let me explain what we can do now. There are various options that
he can take now. Three to be exact. The first options there is, is to continue with the regimen we have him in now. We can keep doing the therapies and give him a stronger dose of medicine. The second option is to simply relocate him to an institute where he and the family can be prepared for his death. They help with the arrangements necessary for his funeral, give him pain medicine and make him feel no pain, such things.”
“ He shall go to no such place!”
“Yes, well, there is a third and final option, which is to put him in a waiting list for -”
“Put him in a waiting list? Since when do we have to wait? We are the Beddaus!”
“Yes, I know, but please let me finish, a waiting list for “Save A Life Institute”. It is another institute where people give their lives to other people.”
“And why was I not told of this before?”
“Mrs. Beddau, not many are even given such option. It is a complicated, long procedure and very expensive.”
“I am sorry Doctor, but are you blind? You are talking to a Beddau!”
“Yes, I know, but not even the few we have given such option took it. To be even considered for the pre-waiting list ranges up to a million. Would you like to consider the first two options or should I continue?”
“I don’t see why you even ask.”
“Very well, once in the pre-waiting list, he has to fill out papers and documents. Once that is
done then he is transferred to the institution and placed in the waiting list. From there other steps are taken. This could add up to more than a billion. If you are interested in this option I can give you their number that you could call and let an Institute worker give you more details on the procedures and such.”
“Yes, please. I seriously cannot believe you waited until now to tell me.”
“Very well. Here is their card. Please let the nurse know if you need anything else.”
The doctor left the room quickly. They were alone. His mother contemplated the dull gold card with the silver lettering and the bright red heart. It was a lot to take in on one day for Elionai. He was still not used to his mother and the doctor talking about him as if he was not there. He felt like a thing rather than a person. A thing that had no more use, that was fading. Could he really have another chance to live? What was this institute the Doctor mention? Can it really be possible to give a life to someone else? A million questions shoot through his mind, but the most important one question was: is he willing to do it. “Yes” he thought to himself. He did not want to die, not yet at least.
The Doctor announced coldly as he handed him the final results from the tests he had taken. Elionai had been expecting such news. He felt how his body grew weak and cold after the Doctor’s words. It was over then, he had an expiration date. His thoughts were interrupted by his mother’s arrogance.
“No! there must be something else. A cure, surgery, medicine, therapy, anything, everything, just something. Something!”
“Mrs. Beddau, I know this must be hard, it’s not an easy thing, but you must understand we have tried all those things for months. Time is running out. We can keep trying but we cannot promise anything.”
“There must be something we have not tried! You must understand he’s our only son, the inheritor of everything we have worked for, our name carrier. He is a Beddau for God’s sake!”
“I clearly understand Mrs. Beddau, no one takes such news well. We still have time to try therapy again or if you would like to continue the medicine. I must admit he is not showing any improving results on any of the therapies he has tried.”
“If for a second you think I will not try everything you are wrong Dr. Vineyard.”
“I understand Ma’am, please let me explain what we can do now. There are various options that
he can take now. Three to be exact. The first options there is, is to continue with the regimen we have him in now. We can keep doing the therapies and give him a stronger dose of medicine. The second option is to simply relocate him to an institute where he and the family can be prepared for his death. They help with the arrangements necessary for his funeral, give him pain medicine and make him feel no pain, such things.”
“ He shall go to no such place!”
“Yes, well, there is a third and final option, which is to put him in a waiting list for -”
“Put him in a waiting list? Since when do we have to wait? We are the Beddaus!”
“Yes, I know, but please let me finish, a waiting list for “Save A Life Institute”. It is another institute where people give their lives to other people.”
“And why was I not told of this before?”
“Mrs. Beddau, not many are even given such option. It is a complicated, long procedure and very expensive.”
“I am sorry Doctor, but are you blind? You are talking to a Beddau!”
“Yes, I know, but not even the few we have given such option took it. To be even considered for the pre-waiting list ranges up to a million. Would you like to consider the first two options or should I continue?”
“I don’t see why you even ask.”
“Very well, once in the pre-waiting list, he has to fill out papers and documents. Once that is
done then he is transferred to the institution and placed in the waiting list. From there other steps are taken. This could add up to more than a billion. If you are interested in this option I can give you their number that you could call and let an Institute worker give you more details on the procedures and such.”
“Yes, please. I seriously cannot believe you waited until now to tell me.”
“Very well. Here is their card. Please let the nurse know if you need anything else.”
The doctor left the room quickly. They were alone. His mother contemplated the dull gold card with the silver lettering and the bright red heart. It was a lot to take in on one day for Elionai. He was still not used to his mother and the doctor talking about him as if he was not there. He felt like a thing rather than a person. A thing that had no more use, that was fading. Could he really have another chance to live? What was this institute the Doctor mention? Can it really be possible to give a life to someone else? A million questions shoot through his mind, but the most important one question was: is he willing to do it. “Yes” he thought to himself. He did not want to die, not yet at least.
Thursday, February 19, 2009
The Rag Doll
He saw the broken rag doll on a dirty road
He looked at her with odd awed
He picked her up and gave her hope
He picked her up and gave her a taste of love
He took her to his home
He placed the doll on a high stand
where he could appreciate her rotten face
He could see her beaten legs
Dirty and tattered to the core
He could see her dress
shredded to pieces
by millions of moths
What had been locks of hair was now
two strands of raw cords
that sat on top of her bare head
Making her look like a gruesome burlesque
Her arms could barely hold themselves in place
Her face was cold and tearful
Her mouth was full of blood
Her cheeks were frozen zircon
Her eyes the color of estiercol
No one would dare to look at her
Beneath the shattered dress
she had an aperture deep inside her chest
There it laid a deep black hole
where only a heart could belong
There underneath such pestilence
a small tiny heart belonged
Her fake smile was gone
He looked at her with odd awed
He picked her up and gave her hope
He picked her up and gave her a taste of love
He took her to his home
He placed the doll on a high stand
where he could appreciate her rotten face
He could see her beaten legs
Dirty and tattered to the core
He could see her dress
shredded to pieces
by millions of moths
What had been locks of hair was now
two strands of raw cords
that sat on top of her bare head
Making her look like a gruesome burlesque
Her arms could barely hold themselves in place
Her face was cold and tearful
Her mouth was full of blood
Her cheeks were frozen zircon
Her eyes the color of estiercol
No one would dare to look at her
Beneath the shattered dress
she had an aperture deep inside her chest
There it laid a deep black hole
where only a heart could belong
There underneath such pestilence
a small tiny heart belonged
Her fake smile was gone
She did not belong there
Much less elevated in such high place
She was repulsive to the sight
But he would give it a try
If he could make the doll feel
He would accomplish his deed
He looked through her crude eyes
and told her wonders of something called love
The doll bled from her hole
and tiny droplets rolled down her eyes
He touched her mounstrous face and said
"you ought to be mine"
He kissed her deteriorated lips softly
tasting her tartful blood
The hole bled and bled
Her eyes poured rain
She was somehow complete
But she found herself in his arms
She was repulsive to the sight
But he would give it a try
If he could make the doll feel
He would accomplish his deed
He looked through her crude eyes
and told her wonders of something called love
The doll bled from her hole
and tiny droplets rolled down her eyes
He touched her mounstrous face and said
"you ought to be mine"
He kissed her deteriorated lips softly
tasting her tartful blood
The hole bled and bled
Her eyes poured rain
She was somehow complete
But she found herself in his arms
brutally shaken by his brusque hands
She felt her arms torn apart
Just like her illusion of being put back
He picked her up from the ground
Only to throw her to the trash
Maudlin as it sounds,
she belonged there
after all......
She felt her arms torn apart
Just like her illusion of being put back
He picked her up from the ground
Only to throw her to the trash
Maudlin as it sounds,
she belonged there
after all......
Monday, February 16, 2009
Lustful Reverie
The cool evening entered through the window like a ghostly cloud, filling the room with thick stupor. In a large stately bed there laid two bodies in a dormant state. Oblivious of the night they dreamt tranquil dreams. Gerard opened his eyes in thick stupor. His eyes fell at his bed companion, a petite figure dreamt next to him. He slowly accommodated himself to her body. He had Adelaide underneath him. Their two bodies naked, moving, in synchronized rhythm. Their breath were shallow and deep. The red silky sheets played with their naked skin as it followed their movement. He felt her quiver underneath him, felt her grow tense as time kept ticking. Her back curved as she came near climax.
It was going all too fast. He had to finish. He had to please her. He had to... He opened his eyes to the tranquil night. He woke up. His heart beated faster than a broken clock. He was panting. He looked to his left ans saw his humming bird under his wing. There, on top of his breast laid the fragile creature. Her thick black hair covering half her face. Her beige skin glowed with the moon's rays. Her lips were slightly parted, whispering air through them. Her wide eyes shut closed to the serene evening. She opened her eyes only to meet his. Her sharp brown eyes dazed on his gaze. They were filled with thick reverie. He spontaneously kissed her soft lips. She responded lightly, slowly.
He knew he should not do more than that, but he could not stop. His hand slipped slightly contouring her small frame. The thick harsh night gown bothered him. With audacity he ripped it off with his hands. As fragile as she was he placed her naked frame on top of his, delicately. He kissed her more deeply now. He placed his hands on her back, caressing while directing. Her soft moans made him more intense. he palpated her round breasts. She quivered at his touch. The pace picked up, the moans grew louder.
He closed his eyes and drowned himself in pleasure. He felt her stop. He opened his eyes in alert. He saw her eyes filled with panic. She was bright awake.
"S-s-stop" she muttered.
He stopped. She collapsed softly to his side, covering herself quickly with the red silky sheets. She was panting, failing to recover her normal breathing.
"What's wrong?" he asked with a puzzled look.
"I thought... I was... dreaming." She responded in shallow breaths. Seconds passed by. He laughed. She made a disgusted face.
"Sorry" he apologized trying to hide his smile. "Sorry" he apologized again, this time with a serious face. He hugged her torso. He placed his chin on her shoulder, breathing her flowery fragrance from her hair.
Sunday, February 15, 2009
Warning: before you read
Yes... I am human.. and I made mistakes...
soo yes I have misspelled words... gramatic errors... fragmented sentences..and such..
I'll try to correct them.... later on... all of this got posted in less than an hr... soo I had no time to actually correct stuff... anyways... just bare with it and stick it ;D
soo yes I have misspelled words... gramatic errors... fragmented sentences..and such..
I'll try to correct them.... later on... all of this got posted in less than an hr... soo I had no time to actually correct stuff... anyways... just bare with it and stick it ;D
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